Tommy Kern Scores....Opposition Left Deflated   Subscribe via RSS

04/19/2011 8:28 PM : Random Hobo

     Boston Avenue Athletic Club Headquarters- Let's talk referee assessments. Occasionally young, up and coming referees who are trying to advance their reffing careers have to be assessed (emphasis on ass). This is done by having a bunch of referee assholes critique another referee asshole. Our club draws these assessed matches when the upper echelon referee assholes don't want the referee to get a good assessment. Apparently our matches our classified as "difficult". The first thing the ref asked was that we not swear. The actual response to that, before the match had even started, was "Fuck you chump". Gonna be a "difficult" day, eh ref?


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A's Stomp Former Nemesis   Subscribe via RSS

04/10/2011 1:23 PM : BAAC Headquarters
BAAC VS

Boston Avenue Athletic Club Headquarters- An article last year de-nemesized DTU due to a lack of competition. Sunday was more of the same. The A’s took the lead from a corner in the 11th minute as Jason Ganus nodded home his first of the season. Ganus later double the lead and his goal tally with a sublime effort from 22 yards out. Brian McCurdy pioneered a new position. He calls it Left defender. A left defender apparently plays just in front of the two forwards never crosses back onto his own half of the field. The player also has very little if nothing to do with being on the left side of the field. McCurdy is an absolute master of this position. Sonny Dalesandro was relieved to see his atrocious miss in the first match of the season topped when Tommy Kern missed from literally 2 feet away. Patty Ryan grabbed himself a much deserved goal, which means the apocalypse may be closer than experts had initially predicted. The Athletic’s romped, sadly against a team that they used to harbor so much hatred for. I love you.


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Athletic's Literally Fight Their Way To First Victory + Soccer 101   Subscribe via RSS

04/10/2011 1:22 PM : BAAC Headquarters
BAAC VS

Boston Avenue Athletic Club Headquarters- What do you get when you mix Ghanaians and Mexicans? Give up? The worst possible opponent for the B.A.A.C. to play nice with. Rozy FC are just that, a team comprised totally of Mexicans and Ghanaians. See, in soccer the Mexican value system is far different than the rest of the world. They believe dribbling past the same guy three times is worth a point, and that if you put the ball through your opponents legs it’s worth a million points and a work visa. Ghanaians and Aficans in general get involved in some of the most outlandish and shockingly violent tackles known to man. So that makes Rozy FC essentially half prima Donna weenies and half reckless thugs. A mixed bag, and certainly a recipe for trouble with the B.A.A.C. as they don’t liked to mocked or bullied. So, as the A’s were up 3-0, it was no surprise when Ben Fell was sent off for fighting. What was a surprise was that it was only for pushing the opponent after being pushed first. It was certainly no surprise when 15 minutes later a total melee broke out and every man from both teams was involved in the sweet science as opposed to the beautiful game. Two things happened as a result of the brawl. 1.) They got their asses kicked….and 2.) We won 3-0 through the match being terminated, which has brought to light our new strategy of “When in the lead…Make ‘em bleed”. It was rumored that they went to their cars and got guns. Awesome.


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A's Help Reserves By Tying So-Called Team of Hot Shot�s   Subscribe via RSS

04/10/2011 1:22 PM : BAAC Headquarters
BAAC VS

Boston Avenue Athletic Club Headquarters- Elite FC are a pretty solid team. They’ve finished second to the B.A.A.C. Reserves several times, and usually give the first team a decent ass whooping. The problem is that one of their players wears sunglasses…even during night games. Every player in the entire Boston Avenue Athletic Club (girls and over 40’s included) would rather have blood drenched eyes than ever even consider playing with “prescription” sunglasses on. It’s this sort of ridiculous behavior that continually keeps the fire alive in the hearts of all B.A.A.C. members. This was more than apparent when the A’s took a surprise lead through the head of Greg McKenna after 15 minutes. Elite answered back before Brian McCurdy smashed home his second of the year to restore the one goal lead. Elite drew even once again before the Athletic’s scored one of their finest goals of the season. Kevin Drouillard started the move by finding the feet of ever-reliable Patty Ryan, Ryan in turn played a ball for McCurdy whose first time pass put Dalesandro in, Dalesandro probably should have shot but instead opted to play a square pass to Paul Johnson who graciously found the roof of the net.


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A's See Red, Lose Derby   Subscribe via RSS

04/10/2011 1:22 PM : BAAC Headquarters
BAAC VS

Boston Avenue Athletic Club Headquarters- Having taken their first ever point from the Veteran’s Park derby last season, the A’s entered Sunday’s match confident that they could improve on last season’s effort and grab all three. Things looked good after 25 minutes when a long ball from Tommy Kern found Dalesandro who calmly lifted the ball over Boulder’s dwarf of a goalkeeper. At 1-0 things seemed fine until Dalesandro was sent off for getting elbowed.


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